My students aren’t sure what a hook-up really means, or how to find a lasting relationship when casual sex is the norm.So when the Newman Center invited me to speak to young adult Catholics on these issues, I jumped at the chance.Lisa Duffy, an author and speaker for the Catholic Match institute, overcame a painful divorce and annulment, remarried in the Church, and has spent the past twenty years ministering to those who have been wounded by divorce.In (Ave Maria Press, 2015), Duffy provides authentic Church teaching on divorce, annulment (including the benefits of going through the process), remarriage and receiving the Eucharist.By implementing checklists and quizzes she helps the reader ask themselves if they possess these qualities and if their prospective dates have these qualities as well.In her continued mission to aid others in the process of divorce recovery, she will be presenting at the Journey of Hope Conference this August in Charleston, SC.I thought I would post these ‘Rules or Boundaries for Catholic Dating’ because today’s hook-up culture; today’s self-directive, self-expression culture, promotes things that can be most unhelpful to the soul!
Instead, spend time with one another’s family: get to know your date in a family context; go out as part of a group; get to know what your date is like socially.This is a blog written by the man in the street for the man in the street; we are not presenting authoritative or ‘academic papers’ but sharing our thoughts and views, faithful to the Magisterium of today and yesterday (we hope!) Comments made and Posts to which we link are not necessarily supported by the authors of this blog, nor are the posts of either blogger the responsibility or views of the other! All of these boys were Catholic—either practicing or, at least, culturally Catholic. I figured, I’d meet some Catholic boy eventually, have the Catholic wedding, and have the Catholic babies and that’d be it. At eighteen, I moved away for college and planned on focusing on school, having some fun, and getting into dental school. We spent about three months going on dates, spending time together, meeting each other’s friends, and getting to know one another. He did not shy away from that label and he proudly called me his girlfriend. He looks up to his father and has a loving and devoted relationship to his mother. He did not talk disrespectfully to his mother and he sought advice from his father. Even when we were upset or mad or hurt, we took the time to hear one another out. Early on, he would come to Mass with me and I would go to church with him. If I were not able to talk about my faith or if I never was able to share it with him, I do not think we would have stayed in a relationship.I would think about serious dating eventually and get married eventually. During my first semester of college at a local club, I met him. He was non-denominational Christian and had a faith-filled upbringing. But at some point I had to really decide if dating a non-Catholic was something I could do. We had a conversation about exclusivity and when we both discussed that our dating relationship would be exclusive and serious, I knew that was a big step in the right direction. Dating each other was a commitment to be honored and respected. He loves his siblings and even while away at college, remained involved in their lives. He reminisced about summer get-a-ways with his grandfather. I come from a big, loud, and incredibly loving family. (He has also has not said he won’t ever convert, so fingers crossed and prayers his way.)While I was applying to dental school, I had my first serious thoughts of marriage.